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04 April 2017

Sums it Up

Walk in my shoes
start the day waking to your muscles contracting
you feel a tug within your skin pulling at the nerve fibers
you try to relax at the same time reminding yourself to breath
your breath is labored
a mouth breather
how quickly you become dehydrated
fighting the pain that erupts from each joint you get up
choking down behind clenched teeth a scream
agonizingly you make your way to the bathroom

I'll skip over natures necessities
leaving you knowing that you finish covered in a cold sweat

you struggle methodically to remove you night wear
turn the shower on
you cringe as your skin becomes hypersensitive
you suddenly become hydrophobic
somehow you get in
clenching your teeth so tight you can hear them fracture
pins and needles covered in bee stings accosts you relentlessly
fighting fire with fire you embrace your flesh
willing it to calm
finishing the grueling task of staying clean you try to dress
again your body decides to oppose you
perspiration is your enemy
your wetter then you were in the shower
letting lose you scream
obscenities erupt without censorship

acceptance
you realize you can't fight it
you work within the pain and inabilities
taking mental inventory of all abnormalities

after several hours of stretching
relaxing and contracting limbs
reminding yourself to breath
your body releases the rigor mortis state it was in

your now in a time constraint
history has proven that come five o'clock
or should you sit and rest
your body once again goes into rigor mortis

day after day
it wears you down
you find out how true it is
a far away place in your head
start loosing time
in the hear and now you have drool running down your chin
realizing you don't care
a state of bliss

a fake reality

Copyright © 2017 Patrick B Vince

shit I'm fortynine

I had a birthday

feeling old not older

don't feel desirable

I see fat and disgusting in the mirror

I move slower with pain etched on my face

I'm depressed and sexually frustrated

I'm everything I don't want to be

and I lack the ability to change

I seek validation

want to be wanted

needed

seen

right now though

I don't want to be

Copyright © 2017 Patrick B Vince

01 March 2017

A fairy tale


There's a falling star that grants wishes

a rainbow in black and white

Prince Charmin with the wake up kisses

and my heart hidden, locked up tight


I went searching for the falling star

saw it crash into the rainbow

though drained of color I saw the scar

I cried as I stood in it's shadow


Ran down and exhausted I fell asleep

woke up in the land of make believe

where I found true love in a garbage heap

I felt a change as I turned to leave


With ice for blood I feel no pain

and love's a word I've come to hate

Prince Charmin's kiss would be in vain

my heart lays waist at Heaven's gate


Copyright © 2017 Patrick B Vince

12 January 2017

Accept, Believe, Become

Only I can hear the voices in my head
spoken from the graves of those already dead
I became their puppet they my puppeteer
the voices in my head only I can hear

avenging their deaths I do their dirty deeds
finding the guilty the demon in me feeds
relish the moments they take their final breaths
I do their dirty deeds avenging their deaths

Blood on my hands funny seems a normal thing
my sanity's slipping hanging on a string
voices give orders body follows commands
funny seems a normal thing blood on my hands


I relinquished control slipped into a dream
where I filtered the sounds to a silent scream
each life I t00k for them did blacken my soul
slipped into a dream I relinquished control

Became a voice when I died symbiotic
believe a heart attack now that's ironic
had one fucked up life and a hell of a ride
symbiotic became a voice when I died


Copyright © 2017 by Patrick B Vince

07 November 2016

my Love

With eyes closed I experience his touch
strong hands manipulating my flesh
silicone skin bends to his whim
arousing a demon from within
grasping it's head he yanks it's chain
making me scream in ecstasy
with pillow over my head
he takes me to wonderland
I submit my love to him again and again
Copyright © 2016 Patrick B Vince

02 November 2016

Keep my heart bruised

I must really like the abuse
having my feelings minimized by words you say
I give my heart to you and you blindly step on it
to scrape it off your foot later that day
I try to make things go smoothly
I try to lesson your daily task
I want to feel you feel me
yet you have another in your grasp
I get slapped with the your committed
a relationship of convenience
you see how it rolls
but to you I have committed my soul
I wonder if I was out the door before the cloths came off
before you went running into the playroom
not giving me another thought
You don't see how I crave and yearn you
I think you forget I have feelings too
It's times like this I wish I could walk away
walk away and say fuck you
but I can't and I keep coming back
I must really like the abuse

Copyright © 2016 by Patrick B Vince


23 October 2016

One two three, who will it be

It was an abnormally warm October
trees were changing color
spring bulbs were breaking ground
I was counting the days 'till Hollow's Eve

The air was still as death
so dry it stole the moisture from your lungs
I watched the Hunter's Moon cross the sky
felt desire return like an old friend
I continued counting the days

a nigh and day went by
I tasted smells
it woke a hunger
a hunger that fed on fear
arrogance
lust

appetizer
main course
dessert

a smorgasbord
of the tainted
the sick minded
and perverted

he acted like king shit
pushed people around
took candy from kids
thought he was untouchable
it made me salivate
I was in the shadows
he was fucked up
I watched him stumble off to pee
he walked blindly
hairs rose
he opened his eyes
I was the last thing he saw
Before I skinned him alive
One

the next was a husband and father to be
he had a habit nobody's seen
He liked young men to dominate
I vexed him to see me as the perfect mate
He collared and claimed me as his boy
quickly took me home to enjoy
in the privacy of his abode
he stripped me of my cloths
I stripped off his plus his skin
I licked the carcass and tasted sin
his eyes confirmed he was processing
he started to mumble to say something
blah blah blah was all I heard
I started to laugh it was so absurd
Two

He belittled superstitions
he bullied the weak and small
He hid behind a tough guy fa├žade
we started with simple conversation
it grew to hypothetical questions
we created virtual realities
then I made one scenario come alive
where he was the victim
I was the sadistic cannibal
he was delicious
as a token I kept his tanned hide
three

twilight
the morning sun threatened
I've gathered three
the winds changed chord
group psychosis
paranoia was gone
the beast was fed
It was satisfied

went back to counting the days
Copyright © 2016 by Patrick B Vince

05 October 2016

Wait for the light

You're staring
eyes glaring, glazed
you're amazed at what you see
I'm supposed to be dead not here with a shit eating grin

You're confused
which amused me
I set you free, you ran away
I stayed back then followed envisioning you without skin

Feel me near
stay clear the dark
it's been marked as my play space
then again, in case you're curious, feel free to go in

Then one night
despite warnings
since morning seemed within reach
you beseech courage and left the light to visit kin

I followed
you slowed, listened
was stunned when you heard me speak
your death will be unique, I've waited so long to begin”

Petrified
you tried to move
too late I removed your head
you watched as I fed, I smiled back with your blood on my chin



Copyright © 2016 by Patrick B Vince

03 October 2016

addicted

tasting death has made me a junkie
I crave for the next kill
they say one is too many
it controls ones will
the blood cools
coagulates
changes from red to black
again on the hunt ready to attack
let me make love to you with my knife
I don't want your heart but will take your life
Copyright © 2016 Patrick B Vince


25 September 2016

Don't think I Care

You're staring
is there something on my face?
a queer kind of smirk?
you think a smile!?
Excuse me as I giggle and scream vulgarities

I'm a husk of rotting flesh
insensitive
emotionally numb
don't think I care

I'm debating though what you are
an obstacle to a goal?
possibly edible?
maybe a foe?

I see fear in your eyes
it's making me salivate
a shame I already ate you look delicious
this is where you run away
never mind
too late brrp


Copyright © 2016 Patrick B Vince