Death becomes me

Sleeping with my eyes wide open 

Colder than a corpse in a shallow grave 

The dreams I can't remember 

But these scars they leave 

Broken bones and bruises 

Blackened eyes and busted teeth 

How many times did I let loose a deafening scream

Nobody hears 

Nobody sees 

I'm alone in a fucked up reality

Crawling my way out of my skin 

Desperate to breathe again 

Choking on tears of misery

A creation by my own hands 

I wrap the noose around my neck 

And swan dive into Tomorrowland

Don't judge me 

You don't know my pain 

How I'm broken inside 

How I keep the voices at Bay 

How hard it is not to kill you ⁸

aBnormal

 I don't mind being abnormal 

I don't like being like you 

One of the masses 

I'm a fucking individual 

I hold my head high 

Follow imaginary butterflies 

The voices tell me to March on 

I'm different and I'm okay 

How do you enjoy blending in 

No original thoughts or ideas 

Everything you do has already been 

I won't be walking in anyone's footsteps 

It's queer you know 

Being an original 

People gowk speak in hush tones 

Whispering about my differences 

I feel good in my skin 

I see rainstorms and rainbows 

I talk to the dead 

I'm okay with not being right in the head

In my head

Want to see what's hidden in my head? 

It's filled with the suffering tortured and dead 

Synapses firing going insane 

Fight or flight or confused again 

Being not right, I like the screams 

It's sort of like music if you know what I mean 

There's a lot of sticky red stuff flowing from a vein 

And everything is covered in a dark bloody stain 

The smell is atrocious and makes the eyes water 

There's nothing like the aftermath of manslaughter

Insomnia again

Fuck

This sucks

I can't get to sleep 

The hours are ticking away

I'm coming up on the third day 

I've started to see things 

My mind is playing tricks on me 

The white noise has articulated 

I hear every word crystal clear 

I sit in the dark naked hiding a truth 

Yet I show no ill will 

Just a diabolical grin on my face 

Let me kiss you with my teeth 

I'm active when I all I need is sleep 

Another sunrise before my eyes 

Bloodshot like streaks of red in the sky 

I get out of bed body screams mutiny 

I get back in and wait for exhaustion

Fuck

This sucks  

The past?

The past will haunt you 

Nope, not to me 

I'm lucky to remember yesterday 

I try hard enough to live in today 

I don't have the luxury of a memory 

Or at least it needs an upgrade 

I know what I know 

But can't think of a goddamn thing 

Like my grandkids names 

Or where I left my keys 

I have 21 pairs of glasses 

And an extra set of teeth 

So whatever the pass holds 

It's a secret to me

Who am I

Who am I to write these words 

I wonder how you picture me in your head 

Hopefully something normal and not absurd 

After all the things you've read 

I am someone that you recognize 

But never know my name 

I'm not someone thinking things 

That would make you go insane 

My wires are strung too tight 

Dresses sharp you know the type 

Always has a smile on my face 

Creepy as hell but right in place 

Deep down inside past my harsh facade 

I'm a big old teddy bear 

Befriending me earns you applause 

Because from me you've nothing to fear 

I am bias 

As I am him 

Someone that's average 

Someone that blends in

My friend

 Let me tell you about my friend the boogeyman 

He lives in the shadows and travels across the lands 

He's known to be the creature that goes bump in the night 

Has something I'm sure to do with his large knife 

He stays in the darkness away from the light 

Waiting for the perfect time to take a life 

His eyes go red 

Smells like the undead 

And has an evil grin that'll take your breath away 

Tonight he's come to play 

So say hello to the boogeyman

Insight

 I'm trapped in my own mind

Playing chess with the voices in my head

And I'm loosing

No better then the rest

Haters 

You know the ones 

Always judging books by the cover

Belittling their sister's and brothers 

To reach some kind of higher status 

Guess what? It doesn't exist 

It's something created from fantasy 

Some sick twisted fucker thought it'd be great 

To put the rest of us down in a glance 

Keep thinking those pretty thoughts 

In the end, they'll bite you in the ass